Recently, I learned that the Butterfly Girl Podcast is currently ranked as the #1 podcast on Spotify and Apple Podcasts when people search the keywords "faith and hope," according to PodSEO. When I saw it, I smiled not because of the ranking itself, but because it felt like another quiet reminder that God continues to bless what He calls us to do.
When I first began writing books and recording podcasts, I wasn't thinking about rankings, interviews, or recognition. My prayer was simple: "Lord, if You can use my story to help even one person know You more deeply, then it's all worth it." He has answered that prayer in ways I never could have imagined.
But perhaps the greatest miracle isn't the doors that are opening around me. It's what God has been doing within me.
For the first time in my life, I can honestly say that I am the most peaceful and joy-filled I have ever been. That doesn't mean life has suddenly become easy or that there haven't been disappointments, grief, unanswered prayers, or difficult seasons. In fact, some of the hardest chapters of my life have unfolded within the past year. The difference is that my peace is no longer dependent on my circumstances. My joy isn't rooted in success, recognition, or whether things unfold according to my plans. It is rooted in Christ.
There was a time when fear, insecurity, and the wounds of my past shaped so much of my life. Childhood sexual abuse, parental abandonment, and years spent believing I had to prove my worth left scars that only God could truly heal. That healing didn't happen overnight. It came through years of counseling, prayer, spiritual direction, trusted friendships, and slowly learning to believe what God had been saying about me all along—that I was His beloved daughter.
That journey is exactly why I chose the theme for Season 4 of the Butterfly Girl Podcast: Living the Transformation: From Wound to Wholeness. Those words aren't simply the title of a podcast season. They are the story God has been writing in my own life. Transformation isn't pretending the wounds never happened. It is allowing Christ to redeem them. Wholeness doesn't mean our scars disappear. It means they no longer define who we are because Christ has rewritten our identity.
Every episode this season explores what it looks like to move from surviving to living, from hiding to healing, from striving to trusting, and from carrying wounds in isolation to discovering the freedom that comes from allowing God to transform them. As I record these conversations and reflect on the stories of my guests, I realize something beautiful: God isn't simply asking us to talk about transformation. He wants us to live it. Looking at everything unfolding in my own life right now, I can't help but see that this season is a reflection of that very message.
One of the greatest gifts of healing has been learning to trust God's timing instead of trying to control the outcome. I find myself no longer chasing opportunities or worrying about whether the next door will open. Instead, I'm simply trying to remain faithful to the One who keeps opening doors I wasn't even knocking on.
One recent example has been my children's coloring, activity, story, and prayer book, The Life of Blessed Fulton J. Sheen. Through an unexpected opportunity, the manuscript was sent to Ignatius Press for consideration as a possible publishing partnership. Just having one of the most respected Catholic publishers review my work was an incredible honor. While they shared that they genuinely loved the book, they didn't feel they could produce it in time for Archbishop Sheen's anticipated beatification this September. Years ago, I probably would have viewed that as a disappointment or even a closed door. Today, I see it differently. I see a God who is still writing the story.
Almost immediately afterward, another friend who has a relationship with Sophia Institute Press offered to send the manuscript to them for consideration. So now I wait, and I pray. If it is God's will, I trust that He will make the path clear. If it isn't, I will continue doing exactly what He has already placed before me—writing, speaking, podcasting, and sharing the hope He has given me. That peace is a gift. Not because I know how everything will turn out, but because I know the One who does.
This season has also been filled with opportunities I never expected. I've had the privilege of being interviewed on numerous podcasts, featured in newspapers, and next week I'll be appearing on a television talk show based in Bismarck, North Dakota. Every invitation has felt like another unexpected door opening before me. These aren't opportunities I've spent years trying to create. They are reminders that God is capable of doing far more than I could ever plan for myself. When I surrendered my own agenda and simply began saying "yes" to Him one faithful step at a time, He started opening doors I didn't even know existed.
I don't share these things to bring attention to myself. I share them because every opportunity points to God's faithfulness, not my accomplishments. Left to myself, I never would have chosen the experiences that shaped my life. But God has taken the broken pieces of my story—childhood sexual abuse, parental abandonment, years of healing, seasons of grief, and moments when I questioned whether anything good could come from my pain—and He continues to transform them into opportunities to offer hope to others.
If anything good comes from my books, my podcast, my speaking, or these interviews, it belongs entirely to Him. I believe He is using my story, my gifts, and my willingness to simply say "yes" to help people encounter Christ. More than anything else, I want people to know that they are loved, that they are seen, that they are heard, and that they are never alone. If someone finishes one of my books, listens to an episode of the Butterfly Girl Podcast, or hears me share my testimony and comes away believing those truths just a little more deeply, then everything has been worth it.
The Butterfly Girl Podcast being ranked #1 for "faith and hope" is exciting, and I am deeply grateful. But rankings will come and go. Publishing opportunities may or may not happen. Television interviews will end. Recognition fades.
What lasts is the work God is doing in hearts. That is the true measure of success.
As I continue this journey, my prayer remains the same as it was when I first began: "Lord, keep opening the doors You want me to walk through. Give me the courage to follow wherever You lead. Let me never seek recognition more than faithfulness. May every word I write, every conversation I have, every child I reach, and every story I share bring glory to You."
Because this has never been about building my name. It has always been about pointing people to His.
And if my own life is any evidence, then I can say this with complete confidence: Jesus still transforms wounds into wholeness. He still heals. He still restores. He still opens doors no one else can open. And when we follow where He leads, we discover that the greatest miracle isn't what He does through us; it's who He transforms us to become.
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